It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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