I just pynch a tree in the face
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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