I feel like abortions should bother me more
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
