I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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