Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
