Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize