Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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