She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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