she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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