I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
we should paint friendship bongs
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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