Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms