Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You need Xanax blowdarts
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Randomize
