garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
