do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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