If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
