He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize