I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize