Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize