The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
All I want is dick and wine.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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