i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
