girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
