So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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