STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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