First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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