I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
