i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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