I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
