i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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