i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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