Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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