Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
