that's an acceptable place to lick
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
