woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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