My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
