Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize