Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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