So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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