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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hey kate, how is it?

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.

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• (805): View more from California

  My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.

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  27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (860): View more from Connecticut

  MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever

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• 

  These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.

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• (909): View more from California

  I got laid two nights in a row

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  And none for Gretchen Wieners...

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• (518): View more from New York

  Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical

  (212): View more from New York

  I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man

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