My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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