And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize