I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
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