oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
this boner is exhausting
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
