I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize