Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
