Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Randomize
