i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Sext me about skeletons
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
