1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Randomize