Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
