after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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