This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
