he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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